What is mirroring and how can it get in the way of your relationships?



By now we all know that healthy communication is key to any successful relationship. While understanding how to express yourself is important, effective communication also involves good listening. Mirroring is an excellent way to show that you are paying attention to the person you are talking to.

Psychotherapist and sex and couples therapist Lee Phillips, Ph.D., tells Well + Good that this is especially beneficial for those in romantic relationships. Repeating your partner’s words shows that you’re paying attention to everything they say, whether you’re engaged in a heated argument or a small debate. When you repeat it to them, you show that you are not just hearing the words, you are actually digesting them. like dr Phillips explained, practicing this technique during conversations can help partners find common ground in disputes.

A study conducted by researchers from Wellesley College and the University of Kansas found that people have a strong desire to connect with people like themselves. With that in mind, mirroring can certainly come naturally to some couples who have noticed similarities. This can be a great relationship-building tool, although certain risks may still exist.

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